Hey friend!

Lately, I’ve been working on "taking action" —both with my clients and for myself.

More specifically for me on visibility. And let me tell you, it’s not exactly comfortable.

I’m shy. I’m introverted. I’m neurodivergent. That’s not just a personality—it’s a full-blown identity. So when I go to post something… sometimes I don’t.

And I know I’m not the only one.

Maybe for you it’s not posting. Maybe it’s losing weight. Or writing that book. Or launching the art project. Or finally, finally making a big change in your life.

You want it. You really do.

But then… 😵💫 You realise it might require getting up early. 💸 Or paying for coaching. ⏳ Or actually doing the work every week. And that’s where you stop.

Not because you’re lazy. Not because you’re unmotivated. But because your brain is running the wrong equations.

Let’s break those down 👇

🔁 Four mental equations that keep us stuck

1. Hope > Value

As long as you don’t try, you don’t fail. So your brain thinks: “Let’s just hope instead.”

You hold onto the idea that someday you’ll write the book, lose the weight, feel better… but only when the time is right. When you have “spare money.” When life settles down. Until then, you live off hope like it’s credit. And one day… your hope account runs out.

That’s when people book the call. That’s when they finally act. But imagine what would happen if we did it earlier—before things got urgent or dire?

Same goes for another version of this equation:

Obstacle > Value

Say someone books a consultation with me. They want change. But when it’s time to commit, their brain throws up:

Totally normal. But here’s the thing to ask: If you could actually turn your life around… Would it be worth one hour a week? Would it be worth the money? Would it be worth that uncomfortable conversation?

2. Obstacle > Desire

You desire the thing—but only if it comes obstacle-free.

As soon as something hard shows up? You think, “Well, maybe this wasn’t the right time.” (It’s not the timing. It’s the obstacle.)

Here’s the fix: You grow desire not just for the result, but for the journey. Even for the part where you fail.

Especially for the part where you fail and learn. This is what you want from coaching: accelerated learning!!

That way, the next obstacle doesn’t feel like a dead end. It just feels like the next step.

3. Energy < Obstacle

This one sounds like:

(That last one? Mine.)

But here’s what I realised: Maybe the real obstacle isn’t the extra thing I “can’t do.”

Maybe it’s the energy I’m currently using that’s keeping me stuck.

And instead of saying “I can’t do more,” what if I asked: How do I grow my capacity?

That tiny shift makes me more curious.

It even fuels more desire.

And it gets me out of the loop.

(And the answer - which I learnt in concussion recovery- is: by doing 5% more increasingly)

4. I am = I can’t

This one is sneaky. We confuse who we are with what we can’t do.

Or the classic variation:

These are all made-up rules we carry around like gospel. But what if they’re not true anymore? What if they’re only sometimes true? What if they’re just old code that needs rewriting?

🧯Let’s wrap this up:

If you’re not taking action on something you want, check your internal math:

• Are you hoping instead of acting?
• Are you waiting for the desire to outweigh the discomfort?
• Are you assuming you’re maxed out instead of exploring capacity?
• Are you mistaking a trait for a cage?

If so—no shame. Truly. This is every human ever.

But now you see it. And once you see it… you can do something about it.

—

👉 Want help changing the equation?

This is exactly what we do together in coaching. If you’re circling the same goal over and over again—let’s talk. One conversation can unlock what months of thinking haven’t.

Reach out, book a consultation.

No pressure. Just possibility.

Love, math, and messy progress,

Deb